On this journey, I’ve had a lot of wins. Big ones, small ones, “just right” ones. Starting a journey that begins with “You have 120 pounds to lose” is a win — a HUGE one. And starting to run when you’ve only walked? Win. Running a race? Win. Hitting PR after PR? Win after win. With all of these personal victories, how do you choose the one that makes you say: “Yes. Absolutely, 100 percent. THIS is my winningest moment.”
I’ve thought about this since Friday when I decided I wanted to write this post. But, until I sat down to actually write it, I hadn’t decided what it would be. Then, I realized that this whole thing is my biggest win. Keeping a blog, sharing it with the world and being open and honest. That’s my win.
I’m not a big sharer. I prefer to listen and offer advice when I’m asked. I’ve always preferred blending in rather than standing out. And sharing my story? Volunteering information? That is … So. Not. Me. Yet, here I am, on the internets writing about so many personal things. From breaking toilet seats to breaking up with the man I thought I’d marry. From taking (and posting) photos of my derriere (and other body parts) and talking about my gassyness.
It’s scary putting your whole self out there in front of so many people — family, friends and coworkers included. It’s also stressful. And it comes with pressures (self-induced and external). How do you hide your failures and your embarrassments when you’ve vowed to be completely honest with yourself and with the world? You don’t. You’re forced to share your struggles right alongside your successes.
So, yeah, this blog. This is my biggest win. I’m no longer ashamed of who I am — the good, the bad and the gassy.