Everybody’s Business

I’ve been crafting this post in my head for a while, not quite sure if I should write it or just leave it in my head. But, I decided to share it with the Tumblrverse. Warning: What you are about to read is a rant. I’ll fully admit that I may sound like a snobby, rude person by writing this. But, I just wanted to share these thoughts so I can get them off my chest and move on.

When I first decided to do Weight Watchers and enter this journey to become a more fit, healthier version of myself, there were precious few people I shared it with. I just didn’t think it really was anyone’s business — especially since it was the beginning and there weren’t any noticeable changes. I went into it knowing that if anyone noticed my weight loss or directly asked me how I was doing it, I would tell them and let them join me by supporting me on this journey. No big deal, right? A girl can always you more cheerleaders on her field.

However, at some point it became everyone’s business and people started watching everything I was eating and everything I was doing. OK, I get it. I told you I’m trying to lose weight, so it’s something you’re going to notice. But please don’t think that gives you the right to comment on it every … single … time. Don’t get me wrong, I love hearing encouraging comments and true support from friends, family and coworkers (key word=true). It’s just the “Are you really going to eat that?” comments that strike a nerve.

Well, eventually, those types of comments subsided and new ones emerged: People feeling they need to justify what they’re eating or their lack of exercise to me. Just because I’m on a so-far successful weight-loss journey, it does not make me the weight-loss police. I really don’t care what you eat or what you do in your spare time unless it affects me. And, I can talk about other things. If I ask you what you had for dinner last night, I’m not asking for you to list the nutrition information or make excuses for your pizza or burgers or beer — I just truly want to make conversation with you.

But here’s the thing: If you’re going to pretend you know what I’m going through and how difficult this journey really is because you’re also “trying to lose weight,” please don’t make my struggles look less difficult because you’re half-a**edly and half-heartedly trying. I get really frustrated when I hear people say they know what I’m going through and that losing weight is difficult, but then they put in 15 minutes on a treadmill and drench their salad in dressing (with a side of more dressing, topped with cheese). Or saying they’ve watched it come off so quickly and easily for me when, really, every slice of pizza I pass up is difficult. I still WANT to eat cheeses and french breads and pastas and burgers like I used to. But I don’t because I know if I do, I’ll start back down the hill. And, almost every morning I wake up at 5:30 to go to the gym, I just want to roll back over and snuggle back in. But, I go because I know I’ll feel better in the end and it will get me closer to my goal.

This hasn’t been easy for me; every day is a new challenge. And, it’s going to last my whole life. Sure, passing up the pizza or cheese or white bread on most occasions will get easier (it already isn’t as hard as it once was), but I’ll always have to be diligent about what I put in my mouth and the time I spend at the gym.This isn’t a passing interest for me — it is the way I live my life now.

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